Three Ways Listening Helps You Better Understand Your True SELF — Nina Zapala

8 min readAug 20, 2021

Three ways listening helps you better understand your true SELF was a message I received on a meditative walk. When I walk, I typically have a question to ask Divine Intelligence. The question on my mind the other day was, “How can I listen more deeply to what my spirit guides are trying to tell me.”

I heard laughter. Not snickering, mind you, but rollicking laughter.

“What’s so funny?” And they said, “Nina, listen with both ears. We are always communicating with you.” Now it was my turn to laugh. I had not fully committed to the fine art of deep listening, which I know is a spiritual process helping me initiate peaceful, harmonious dialogues.

If you are strapped for time, click here for the cliff notes, or check out my six-minute video on YouTube. Or are you eager to understand the dynamic listening style of your personality type book a session? Click here.

1. Exploring Fears to Better Listen and Understand the True Self

As many of you may know, I’ve gone through a pretty tough, 7-year life tsunami. Life as I knew it changed forever. I won’t go into it now but click here if you’re curious to see how my life went bonk-shit-crazy.

I want to share the life experiences that taught me valuable lessons, now known to me as soul wisdom. You, too, can gain the wisdom of the soul if you face your fears, aka shadow energy.

Fear and shadow energy show up as trauma, pain, and great suffering, hiding in plain sight; in daily stress, triggers, overwhelm, and anxiety. These shadow energies are more insidious, as small fears slowly tear us apart.

Here’s the thing, we are human beings. Fear and shadow energy will always be a part of our lives it’s how we evolve as beings, but it’s only when we do the work, ready to fully explore these dark energies, do we reap the benefits of shedding old fears, while also releasing a controlling ego. It’s time to turn to love consciousness.

My 7-year life tsunami had me tuning into what each fear, aka shadow message, was trying to tell me to stop the chaos in my life. I looked at each fear and asked, what are you here to teach me. And each time I asked, fear answered. Sometimes I wasn’t ready to hear, and other times I was shocked by what I heard.

What Shocked Me

What I thought was so ugly in another, what I judged in another, and what I found annoying in others were my own fears and shadows. I was trying to hide these ugly aspects of myself from my loved ones, and more importantly, myself. I was running from me, repressing moments of unexpressed fears.

Wondering how to unravel fears? The first place to look is your personality type, specifically the Essential Self, also known as the dominant trait. It offers giant clues and ways to unlock fears to reprogram the mind. What happens is when the Essential Self is unhealthy, it’s trapped in repressed moments and unexpressed fears:

pain
guilt
shame…

Wondering how to unravel fears? The first place to look is your personality type, more specifically, the Essential Self, also known as the dominant trait. It offers giant clues and ways to unlock fears to reprogram the mind. What happens is when the Essential Self is unhealthy, it’s trapped in repressed moments and unexpressed fears.

Myself as an Example

My dominant trait is extroverted intuition, which is bound to possibilities, new ideas, opportunities, creativity… When it’s imbalanced, I become overwhelmed in my quest for new possibilities. I get so busy that I don’t take time to analyze, stop and think. I skip listening to my higher self about what is best for me and others. Instead of recreating the ordinary into something extraordinary, I’ve become ignorant, arrogant, and compulsive. I’ve stopped listening to what my trait is trying to tell me. Eww!

Listening to an unbalanced personality trait is critical for self-growth. Please also realize, both loving and fear aspects are within each trait, too. It’s why I’m adamant about everyone knowing each trait in its entirety. It’s how we attain a pure, childlike persona; playful, kind, open-minded…

When we become willing to listen to what fear is trying to teach, we gain deeper understandings of our personality types, allowing us to take a step closer to our nonphysical selves. This is how we discover our true SELF.

Our shadow is the person we would rather not be. — Carl Jung, Swiss Swiss psychiatrist, founder of analytical psychology

2. Listening Intentionally is Another Way to Help You Better Understand Your True SELF.

I speak a lot about the nonphysical aspects of intentions, intuitions, and gut instincts. Intuition is Divinely inspired and highly personal. It’s the way we discover and rediscover the gifts we are born with.

The power of intuition literally allows us to tap into Soul wisdom, which listens and receives messages from Divine Intelligence, ahh intentional listening. This isn’t listening through the physical sense of hearing. It’s channeled from the Divine, and it takes great courage to hear, and yes, sometimes rollicking laughter from spirit guides to waken us to the path of deep, personal listening.

Please realize a gut instinct is always a gentle message, intentionally subscribed by the true SELF. It’s never negative, demanding, or punishing us for taking action. This is the ego, which is often fear-driven.

And when we learn to listen, we open to the myriad voices of life and the silent mysteries of the soul and begin to sense the truth of being alive. — Llewellyn Vaughan-Lee, Sufi teacher

3. A Perceiving Persona Trait: Sensor or Intuitive Listening.

We are all programmed to receive and retrieve information. We do so by using sensing or intuitive traits, defined by Carl Jung as perceiving functions. Let’s look at these relatively passive functions in more detail. I understand this is a generalized view as I’ve not considered the additional traits that create each fabulous persona.

Extroverted Sensors and Intuitives are similar, as they both desire stimulation from the outside world seeking diversity and novelty. Yet an extroverted sensor is responsive, quick, and relishes social chit-chat sharing noteworthy things, details, and sights to share. On the other hand, extroverted intuitive’s abhor chit-chat, they prefer deep, theoretical discussions on how things relate. They will listen for hours if the topic interests them.
Introverted Sensors and Inuitives are more reflective naturally. Introverted sensors rehearse things before speaking, are slow to respond, and are often superb listeners. An introverted intuitive will want to extrapolate each fact, theorizing and looking for a bigger version of what is; highly insightful.

Conscious Communication

Remember, we must give others the space to speak what they believe is their truth. We are not here to judge; we are here to create and learn. Personality typing with a spiritual understanding leads to a more compassionate self.

In my upcoming book, the Soul’s Role in Personality Typing©️ , I go into great detail about each personality type’s communication styles and message triggers. We will dive into listening triggers to pay attention to and the message they want to deliver. This allows for greater learning of the true SELF.

Listening Helps You Better Understand Your True SELF: #journalprompt:

Start today by observing your communication style, seeing how you react and how others react to you. Be present for each conversation; it’s a gift you give to another. Make time for pause and reflection. Empty your mind at the beginning of each dialogue.

Try to listen beyond just words. Connect with your soul SELF. What is it trying to reveal?

Deep listening is a spiritual practice. The Sacred Art of Listening is a wonderful book on the topic.

More About the Soul’s Role in Personality Typing.

I hope you found Three Ways Listening Helps You Better Understand Your True SELF eye-opening. I’m passionate and intentional about introducing the idea of personality tying with a spiritual understanding to help you awaken to your true SELF.

The career personality typing model of the 1950s is fine. Yet, as we awaken to our spiritual needs, we must incorporate the gifts of a healthy personality type to support our spiritual selves. When our physical and spiritual selves are in union, we express our soul intentions through our persona, taking Divinely inspired action in all we do. Ahh, the True Self in action. The True Self is always with you, exuding joy, passion, and purpose.

You Are Not Alone in Life’s Transitions.

Are you asking yourself these questions; “Who Am I?” “How did I get here?” “Why Am I Here?” “What Are My Dreams and Desires?” Know you are not alone 93%of people desire to change something about themselves?

Why would you want to change what the Creator intended for you? Your personality type can help you find answers during times of monumental challenge, struggle, and pain, and the joy, growth, and gifts you are here to share with the world.

I say Don’t Change Yourself. Find Your True SELF.

These are times of great chaos and evolution. A time when critical decision-making skills can positively alter the course of your life. Relying on someone else’s opinion makes them the author of your impending new life. Take your story back and become fully in charge and capable of deciding from the true SELF.

I’m here to share the liberating lessons and soul wisdom I gained going through my transitional 7-year life tsunami to help guide you through yours. So what are you waiting for? It’s time.

Note: I’m a certified Myers-Briggs® instructor with an intuitive side and ready to introduce you to a new paradigm in personality typing supported by a spiritual understanding.

Are you going through a life transition? Becoming a parent, empty nester, going through a divorce, or major career change? Mastering your spiritual personality will give you the clarity, confidence, and courage to guide you into your next life chapter.

Join The Movement.

Are you ready to find yourself? If so, I’d love to see you on YouTube, Pinterest, LinkedIn, or Instagram. But, of course, the best way to feel part of this community is by subscribing to my email list.

Photo Credit: Unsplash, @ericmok